Scales of Injustice

If you have been following my C25k progress, or if you saw my Facebook post early last week, you probably saw that I thought I had lost 16.8 pounds since starting the running program.   THOUGHT.


Unfortunately, when I went to weigh myself this morning, I discovered a major malfunction with our scale.  It said I weighed 287 pounds.  I stepped off, and stepped back on. 68 pounds.  What the heck?


So I swapped out the batteries, grabbed an unopened sack of rice flour and tried again. 5.2 pounds. Now we're getting somewhere.


Except that when I stepped up, I hadn't lost nearly as much as I thought, only about 10.7 pounds. Instead of  feeling let down, I reminded myself that 10.7 pounds is nothing to shake a stick at, a point driven home much faster as I hefted the 5 pound sack of flour back into the cupboard. Wow, two sacks of flour lighter than when I started.


I am proud of that small accomplishment, and remain motivated.  Maybe even more so now.


I guess that is what I get for being prideful.

New Year, New Me?

Nuh-uh. Not this year. I don't think so. 

I am not keen on New Year's resolutions in the first place, and I am even more against the idea that once year (and every year) I decide to reinvent myself. 

There are the easily measurable versions of "the new me": losing weight, saving more, eating and using less.  Then there are the more indefinite promises: the "to live more in the moment" me, the "be a better friend/partner/parent" me.

And what do I notice most about all of these?  The resolutions are all internally motivated; however you look at it, it really is all about me.

And I find that incredibly selfish.  I mean, what kind of resolution is that: to spend the next year making myself the ultimate priority?

Now, I am not saying that putting a higher emphasis on my health or personal relationships is a bad thing, for me, or for anyone else.  In fact, I am starting a new running program with my husband to raise our level of fitness AND spend more time together not in front of a TV or a machine.

But I refuse to make that my resolution.  I refuse to have ANY resolutions for 2012.  I just want to continue living, heart open and thankful for the friends and family members in my life, and many opportunities that I have been blessed with.